PUA Scenario Library
Real manipulation patterns, how they work, and how to recognize them
What's Actually Happening
PUA (Pick-Up Artist) tactics aren't just about dating. They're psychological manipulation techniques used to control, confuse, and coerce people into compliance.
These patterns work on normal people because they exploit basic human needs: connection, validation, and trust. Recognizing them is the first step to protecting yourself.
Gaslighting
highWhen someone makes you question your own reality
"That never happened. You're making things up."
Guilt Tripping
highWhen someone makes you responsible for their emotions
"After everything I've done for you..."
Love Bombing
mediumWhen someone overwhelms you with excessive attention and affection
"You're the only one who truly understands me."
Boundary Violation
highWhen your limits are reframed as problems
"You're being too sensitive."
Victim Playing
mediumWhen they position themselves as the victim to avoid accountability
Everyone always hurts me. You're just like them.
Isolation Tactics
highWhen someone separates you from your support systems
Your friends don't really care about you like I do.
Pressure & Urgency
mediumWhen false urgency is used to prevent thoughtful decisions
I need to know right now.
Triangulation
highWhen third parties are weaponized against you
Even your mom agrees with me.
Future Faking
mediumWhen promises about the future never materialize
When things settle down, we'll...
Responsibility Shifting
mediumWhen blame is ambiguous but credit is never shared
"We're a team. We all share responsibility."
Performance Threat Innuendo
highWhen job security is used as implicit leverage
"I'm not threatening you, just reminding you that opportunities are limited right now."
Emotional Professionalism Attack
highWhen legitimate concerns are dismissed as "being emotional"
"You're being too emotional about this."
Informal Punishment
highWhen you're excluded, not criticized
[Silence - no direct communication]
Exploitative Growth Framing
mediumWhen overwork is disguised as opportunity
"Young people who want to succeed put in the extra hours."
Public Humiliation as Humor
highWhen you're the punchline and can't react
"We're just joking around!"
Collective Silence Pressure
highWhen bystanders enforce your suffering
"Just ignore them and they'll stop."
Label Fixation
highWhen one label rewrites your entire identity
"That's just how they are."
Normalized Hazing
highWhen "tradition" justifies abuse
"This is how it's always been done."
Exclusive Circle Exclusion
mediumWhen social gatekeeping controls access
"It was just a small thing. We didn't think you'd be interested."
Emotional Debt Bondage
highWhen parental sacrifice becomes lifelong obligation
"I gave up everything for you."
Comparative Shaming
highWhen you're measured against others to destroy self-worth
"Look at [sibling/peer]. Why can't you be more like them?"
Experiencing Severe Abuse or PUA?
Call 911 (US) or National Domestic Violence Hotline