What to do when told "you're too sensitive"
被说"你太敏感了"怎么办
The Situation
You express a concern or discomfort, and instead of being heard, you're told you're "too sensitive," "overreacting," or "taking things too seriously."
What's Actually Happening
This is a dismissal tactic. Instead of addressing your concern, they're attacking your right to have the concern. It shifts the problem from their behavior to your reaction, making you the problem.
Why You Feel This Way
You start questioning whether your feelings are valid
You feel ashamed for having normal emotional responses
You begin censoring yourself to avoid being "too much"
You lose trust in your own judgment
The Most Important Thing Right Now
Your feelings are data, not defects. If something bothers you, that information is valid regardless of how others label it.
Your First Step
Stop defending your sensitivity
The moment you try to prove you're "not too sensitive," you've accepted their frame. Your emotional responses don't need justification.
Instead of: "I'm not being sensitive, you actually did hurt me!" Try: "I'm telling you how I feel. You can take that seriously or not."
What To Do Next
Name the pattern
Call out what they're doing: dismissing instead of listening.
"You're changing the subject from what I said to how I said it."
Set a boundary
Make it clear you won't engage with dismissal.
"If you're going to dismiss my feelings, this conversation is over."
Document it
Keep track of these incidents. Patterns reveal manipulation.
Find validation elsewhere
Talk to people who respect emotions. Their perspective will help you stay grounded.
When To Consider Leaving
If someone consistently dismisses your feelings instead of addressing them, you're not in a relationship—you're being managed. Consider whether this person respects you at all.
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